If you’ve just gone through a break up you are probably feeling many things, sadness, anger, even a little panic, especially if it was a long term relationship. What ever happens in the end, now is the time to ask yourself a few key questions, the first being “should we get back together again”. Not, do you want to get back together, or do we have to get back together, but should we get back together. You won’t be able to answer this in the heat of the moment, so, painful as it is, you must give yourself a little bit of time to let your emotions cool down so that you can begin to look at things from a fresh perspective. Then you can begin to make some decisions.
It is a wonderful thing when a couple is able to save a relationship, especially if children are involved, so if you make the decision that yes, you do wish to get back together again, you move to a different stage of your journey to heal your love and rebuild your relationship. This will call for you both to take a bit of time away from each other. Limited contact for a short amount of time will give you each the chance to self reflect and honestly look closely at your separate parts in the break up, and what could have been done differently. You might have done some of this when you made the decision to get back together again, but now you can look deeper to discover the conflicts that brought you to the break up in the first place. This is very valuable information!
The biggest mistake couples make when they try to answer the question, should we get back together again or not, is that they move too fast. It’s so tempting to stop the suffering by quickly getting together again without doing what needs to be done to come back together into a better stronger relationship. It is a difficult strategy to take some time apart, but you will then have a chance to miss each other, and appreciate each other. The pay off of building a successful and happy relationship will be worth every day apart, so use this time wisely.
There are solid techniques you can use when going through a break up, so learn what you need to know, listen to each other and then find the best way for you and the one you love to find your way back together. When you are in love, but have broken up, you must ask that question, “should we get back together again”? If you can truthfully answer that there is a strong possibility to save your relationship and make it better than before, then the answer is yes! Ask yourself honest questions, weigh your options, seek help and then be open to the very real possibility of sharing a love stronger and better than it was before. In the long run that will be worth everything!