Its an old story line and one we see in the news all the time with celebrities and other folks who have gained notoriety for a whole host of reasons. Divorces can be messy, angry and volatile, and they make for great prime time TV court room drama.
In fact, with all that high drama shown in the movies and on prime time TV, many couples dont know there is another choice. The truth is, you dont have to get anywhere near a courtroom to get a divorce. You can choose a process that is far more holistic and healing and ultimately far better for you, your spouseand your children. And I have yet to meet a couple in my Walnut Creek, CA divorce mediation practice that doesnt really want to put their children first.
In mediation or collaborative practice you and your spouse agree to avoid court altogether by working in real time toward solutions that work for both of you.
Divorce mediation attorneys who specialize in mediation and collaborative practice have the training to help you navigate this difficult journey with a dignity and purpose that will benefit your entire family by eliminating the win/lose paradigm and replacing that with a process where we reach an agreement that works for both you, your spouse and your kids.
With an experienced and well-trained collaborative practice expert, you can cover a lot of ground: financial issues including child custody and child support, parenting schedules, medical insurance coverage, property division, possible tax consequences, spousal support, to name only a few.
And its not rocket science. It basically pulls from the principles that guide all good conflict resolution: 1) you agree to forgo the traditional adversarial proceedings 2) you dont set out to capitalize on the mistakes of your spouse 3) you agree to get everything out in the open 4) you agree to keep appropriate information confidential 4) and youll behave yourselves and treat your spouse as you would want to be treated.
In my 25 years as a divorce and mediation attorney (now practicing in Walnut Creek and serving clients in Contra Costa and Alameda counties). Ive seen that mediation and collaborative practice confer other benefits as well.
Couples who go through mediation or collaborative practice to dissolve their marriages:
1)Stop sweating the small stuff.
2)Put their kids first.
3)Learn that trash-talking their soon to be ex-spouse harms the trust and the bridge to the future relationship they must have to co-parent their kids.
4)Learn that they dont have to listen to endless divorce horror storiesbecause the only story that matters is the story they are working out in real time.
5)Learn that there is a place in the process to voice their fears, frustrations and concernsand that theirs fears, frustrations, and concerns can be addressed in a respectful and healing manner.
They also learn that a divorce conducted in the right way can actually give them a chance to re-imagine their lives and create new opportunities. When you divorce in a healing and productive way, you can even imagine joyfully co-parenting your children, sharing in their graduations, dancing at their weddings, sharing in the joys of being a grandparent, and all the other events that mark the high points of our lives. I am the mediation attorney walnut creek who will walk you through the peaceful divorce process. To find out more about the services that I can provide for you, call me at 925-932-7026.